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How I Transformed My Mindset and Became the First Person to Truly Believe in Me

Writer's picture: Natasha NyekeNatasha Nyeke


I’ll admit, I feel a little reluctant to share this part of my story. I have a good (still challenging) relationship with my mum, and I’ve worked with so many people who’ve been through much harder situations than I have. But if you’re someone who’s struggling with your relationships and find yourself thinking, “It’s not bad enough to matter,” I want you to know this: we can’t compare our trauma. Minimizing what we’ve been through only stops us from learning from it and becoming the mum we needed growing up.

At 27, I felt completely stuck. I was unhappy in my job, blaming my problems on managers playing favourites, and feeling like life was happening to me, not something I could control. Looking back, I’d applied for maybe three jobs in two years and only had two interviews. But at the time, I didn’t have the resilience to keep trying when things didn’t go my way.

I didn’t talk about how I was feeling because I thought it would only make things worse. I didn’t have the perspective to understand that applying for just three jobs wasn’t enough to progress. Instead, I told myself I wasn’t good enough, and I stayed stuck.

And then, something shifted. I don’t know what prompted me to do it, but I picked up The Secret. Now, this is a very old-school Law of Attraction book, but it was completely random for someone like me, who had never done any self-development and have an extremely fixed and pessimistic mindset. But reading it absolutely blew my mind.

At the time, I’d been toying with the idea of training as a counsellor, but I’d always convinced myself it wasn’t realistic. I’d tell myself, “It’ll take too long,” or “What if you don’t even get a job at the end of it?” But there was one quote in the book that completely shifted my thinking:

“If you don’t take action now, in five years, you’ll still be complaining about the same things and kicking yourself for not starting sooner.”

For the first time, I realised I was focusing entirely on the last step—what if it didn’t work out?—rather than the first step, which was simply starting. I looked into what it would take to get started, and it turned out I could begin with a £200, 10-week course. Even if I didn’t like it, I’d only be £200 down. I didn’t even have kids back then, so what was stopping me?

That was the moment everything began to change.



How My Mindset Shifted

Reading that book helped me see something I’d never realised before: it wasn’t just life that was hard; my decisions were making it harder.

Therapy later helped me understand how much of this came back to my mum. My parents both had difficult upbringings, and they did so much better than their parents, but the survival strategies that kept them safe were passed down to me. My mum always taught me, “Always expect the worst; anything else is a bonus.”

It sounds like a realist’s motto, doesn’t it? But think about how many opportunities that mindset stops you from even trying for. Imagine if Simone Biles always expected the worst—would she ever have trained hard enough to become an Olympic champion? Imagine if Elon Musk always expected the worst—would he have poured billions into Tesla?

And if we bring it closer to home, imagine if our kids always expected the worst. Would they learn to read? Make friends? Try the monkey bars?

We expect our children to do scary things all the time, fueled by a blind faith that anything is possible. My kids believe they can be astronauts or YouTubers or whatever they set their minds to, and I never want them to lose that. Unfortunately, because my mum didn’t believe that for herself, she couldn’t show me how to believe it either.



The Power of Mindset

For the past 10 years, I’ve worked on my mindset every single day. I believe it’s just as important for our health as exercise or eating well. One of my biggest goals as a mother is to raise my children with a growth mindset because I know they’ll achieve amazing things if they believe anything is possible.

It’s the same for my clients. Helping them see things differently, realise their perspective is often so narrow, and break free from limiting beliefs that feel like the truth is what drives me.

That’s why I created my Mindset for Mums in Business membership.



Why Mindset Matters in Business

As women in business, we need to be our own cheerleaders. Business isn’t a straight, upward trajectory—it’s full of ups and downs, good days and bad ones, and we need the mindset to weather those storms.

Mindset gives us the self-awareness to notice when doubt is creeping in or when limiting beliefs are holding us back. And having a community of women cheering you on when you can’t cheer for yourself makes all the difference.



The Membership Details

The Mindset for Mums in Business membership launched on Monday, 9th December, and founding members are being offered a lifelong price of just £25 a month.

We meet weekly on Mondays, because I believe as business owners, having an anchor to our week is vital. These sessions help us set goals, stay accountable, and work through any doubts or worries that come up.

If you’d like to join the first session for free, send me an email at info@natashanyeke.com—I’d love to work with you.




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